Devotional: relationships

Excerpt from my journal today...

We had devotionals tonight--Carlos presided. He did very well, although he was rather repetitive and dragging things out a bit much. His message was about relationships and he did an interesting slide show that gave me some concrete visuals for the relationship I have with Christ. His slide show consisted of 6-7 slides of various pictures; a slide of fire, an ice berg, a desert scene, a night scene with clouds and a full moon; as well as an open pasture with sunbeams shining through the clouds. My mind focused on the relationship of myself and Christ and I answered the question by saying I'm all of these slides and have had moments of each of these pictures with Christ today. I felt like I'm on fire for Christ as well as my relationship is on fire; I've felt deserted in the desert--all dried up looking for that bit of life; etc., etc. All in the same day--and that has been the usual pattern, although some days are more desert, and some are more flowery. Perhaps this is the way I'm going to be from this point forward--transitioning between periods like these; and I'm generally okay with it--however, I'm tired of the whole show running in one day, every day. That type of transitioning really drains me and causes me to not be all that positive; and controlling the negativity can be hazardous to me as well as others. Overall--I don't know what the next day will bring, which landscape(s) I'll be in nor for how long. I like frolicking in the pastures with the warm sunbeams flooding my soul as well as breathing in the fresh scents from blooming flowers--I occasionally don't mind the walk in the desert either. What I'm tired of is the traversing the whole gamut in a matter of 12 hours or so--and that I struggle with.